Computing Apple's Q1 2026 refresh is here, with something for everyone! Apple has blessed enthusiasts with a platter full of treats for every palate, with new iPhone 17e, MacBook Air and MacBook Pro with M5 variants, and the MacBook Neo.
Apple Athenil Bites, July 25: LeBron James hates his pregnant vids, porn games are being hunted down, and nuclear fuel that takes us to Mars Apple has released the first public beta updates for next-gen software powering iPhones, iPads, and Macs. And yes, it's all about that glass-inspired design.
Apple Athenil Bites, July 23: Amazon's band will hear all you say, good AI guy now wants dirty money, and iPhone brings back AI notifications Apple's AI summaries for news and entertainment are back. Let's hope they don't get another bashing from BBC for blunders. Also, it seems AI is taking the real dark turn for us all.
Apple Athenil Bites, July 17: Mercedes brings meetings to cars, an iPhone case with human skin, and Apple's foldable shocker The iPhone 17 Pro's screen will cheat the Sun. And key scratches. AI? Well, researchers say it lacks confidence and will quickly change its opinion. Finicky shizz!
Apple iPhone 16 & 16 Plus generously offer two new buttons to thirsty buyers Nothing says "revolutionary" more than adding two physical buttons on a next-gen phone. Oh, there's a faster A18 processor inside to handle Apple Intelligence, as well.
Wearables Ugh, looks like the 2024 Apple Watch would sleep on health upgrades Patents, baby, patents. And some good ol' scientific issues with accuracy. At least it'll be slimmer and the display will be bigger. Groundbreaking, if you ask the sheeple!
Apple Apple be like “Here, have these cool iPhone AI features… in 2025” Apple finally caught up to the Android competition with a bucketload of AI features for its hardware. "They gon make yo life easy," they said. They didn't say most of it exists in next year's calendar.
Apple Apple's Mac shitshow is now a pricey shitshow for the iPad, as well Apple thinks you should pay Rs. 1,33,521, at the very minimum, to get the "real" M4 processor inside its new iPad Pro. Mind you, this is a tablet running a mobile operating system.
Future Featured For the love of God, give some 3D porn to yearning Apple Vision Pro buyers! Innocent folks that spent $3,500 on Apple's headset are losing their shit cuz they can't watch 3D masturbatory stuff on the Vision Pro.
Apple Please, get a hold of those notifications & ads. Don’t let apps sell your damned soul. Notifications are collecting data on you and brokers are hawking it to guv agencies. Here’s some eye-opener sauce to convince you, because that Truecaller app you love so much could be selling you out.
Apple Featured Europe boned Apple, and it's finally gonna fix web browsers on iPhones! Apple sucked at innovating Safari for years. Yet, to stop rivals from winning over iPhone users, it forced them to use the same foundation as Safari. That finally changes with some arm-twisting from the EU.
Apple Featured What the hell is Apple doing with console-wannabe gaming on the iPhone? Play console games on an iPhone, they said. It will be fun, they said. Welp, it’s an awe-inspiring shitshow of disappoints and untapped potential!
News This clicky-type thing is a Blackberry keypad for your iPhone It's a good way to summon your nostalgia without giving up on the beloved blue bubbles in iMessage.
Apple Apple admits governments spy on users with push notifications "Democracies allied to the United States" have also been forcing Google and Apple to cough up information on push notifications an average Joe gets on their phone.
Apple India wants USB-C even on older iPhones. Apple cries production tears. Apple says the government rule would derail its local iPhone production plans. Or, it would need at least 18 months to process the shift away and put USB-C on older iPhones.
Rants The iMessage-on-Android security shit-show that is Nothing Chats Hey Nothing, just admit the fumble, take the L, and move on with grace. As for the Sunbird app, let it burn in an unforgiving security hell, never to return again.
Apple Texting between iPhone and Androids will soon be less shitty Will the green bubble of shame go away? Apple's a rich biaatchhh. So likely, it won't.
Apple Next Apple Watch will alert about rising blood pressure, but won’t tell who’s causing it The watch will also asses breathing patterns during your snoozy hours to detect signs of sleep apnea.
Apple Apple’s new Pro laptop dips down to entry-level for cash-strapped dreamers They are black and run fast. Members of the “matte black, everything” cult are orgasming everywhere gazing at it.
Apple Apple ecosystem is finally getting aped for us poor Android-Windows peasants If you’ve ever yearned for the cross-device fluidity of Apple gizmos, but your wallet crushed those dreams, there’s hope. A rewarding Android-Windows experience will kick into action this year. At last!
Apple The iPhone 15 Pro is fine, it's the shitty apps that cause overheating: Apple No, it's not the phone. It's you, bad hooman, using all the bad apps and making the phone sweat.
Apple Broken iPhone 15 Pro shells are far cheaper to fix, but camera repairs get pricier If you live a particularly luxurious techno-hedonistic life and get yourself the iPhone 15 Pro Max, the camera repairs will cost you more. Upgrades, baby!
Apple Apple Watch Series 9 works without ever touching the screen imagine your mortal enemy turned into an ant and you’re crushing them between your thumb and index finger. Yep, that’s exactly how you control the new Apple Watch — by rubbing two fingers.
Apple Apparently, this is what the upcoming iPhones will look like All four iPhones will bear the cyclops look on the screen, and color-matched cables for all the Man-Barbies out there.
Apple Your pricey new iPhones might finally look somewhat different in 2023 The iPhone 15 Pro will trim the black borders around the screen. Apple is also putting a pill-shaped dot on the cheaper iPhones’ screen. Apple is feeling generous. The world is healing. We’re still too poor to afford one!
